I will never understand Danielle M's decision to wear a plunging white satin jumpsuit.
Bachelor League Commentary: I have opinions about the Women Tell All
Nick's Bachelor Blog (People)
I will say, the one thing I still don’t understand is what Liz had to say. When I watched her speak with Chris Harrison, I found that she still didn’t make much sense to me. I’m not aware of any attempt she made at connecting with me before we met again that first night at the mansion. So watching back, I have no idea what she is talking about. If this was something she was so adamant about, I wish she had said something to me when I came onto the floor so we could clear things up. I guess Liz and I will just remain in a state of misunderstanding.
Chris Harrison’s Blog (Yahoo! TV)
Next week is going to be one of the most exciting live three-hour finales ever, and I can guarantee you that you are going to see something you’ve never seen before during After The Final Rose. You don’t want to miss it.
Sharleen Joynt for FLARE Magazine
Rachel, too, was a vision of grace and class. She and Nick still had good chemistry—they even appeared to share an inside joke or two up there—yet it seemed to have morphed into something platonic but every bit as worthwhile. Rachel has such a quiet but strong sense of self worth that, if I had a daughter, I might actually her allow to watch this show to witness. Rachel knows what she has going for her, yet without a hint of arrogance or entitlement. At 31, you get the real sense she’s going into this with very clear needs and wants, and I for one am SO excited to watch her on her own season.
Don't miss Sharleen's full recap on her website too!
I know Nick and Vanessa were both questioning their relationship in last night’s episode, but I can’t figure out if they really are concerned or if it’s edited to seem like they have huge concerns. I mean, the serious music playing in the background is making it seem very dramatic. Ha! I also think that Nick feels so strongly about this relationship that he is LOOKING for something to be wrong.
Let’s move on to Nick’s knit toque with his curly little patch of hair poking out … did it not look a little “elf-on-the-shelf-esque”?? Don’t get me wrong, I’ll gladly take the elf toque over the most turtley of turtlenecks ANY DAY!!
Ashley I. for Cosmopolitan
Some of the other standout moments come from Kristina, who gets the closure she felt she needed from Nick (little birdies had told me that she really was still affected by the breakup months later) and Liz, who gets a bit of a redemption edit with an empowering speech — this is the Liz I know! She can give a heck of a pep talk when a guy's got you down.
Carly + Evan for Bustle
Let’s talk about this amalgamation of makeup and petty arguments that is the Women Tell All. Nick's version found itself profound at times, like when Liz took a stand for women or when Kristina melted our hearts with her powerful story — but the strong majority of the night highlighted our culture's most basal instincts (aka Great TV). The arrival of Bachelor in Paradise has, perhaps unintentionally, introduced a whole new psychological layer of intrigue to the women’s final get together.
The Tell All shows have become something of an audition where the forlorn rose-seekers (and especially the ones whom haven’t had a lot of screen time) are excited to show that they do indeed still exist and have the capability to drum up drama that a show like Paradise demands.
Yahoo! TV by Kristen Baldwin
As a franchise veteran, Nick knows better than to answer Christen’s question about whether he found the deep love he was looking for. “I think maybe we’ll have to tune in?” he responds weakly. Here’s what we have to say to that, pal:
Vulture by Ali Barthwell
Corinne finally takes the stage for a referendum on whether or not she is a bad person and whether taking a nap makes you a bad person. Here’s the thing about Corinne: There are probably ways to make her seem worse than she is, but “loves her longtime family employee and caretaker,” and “takes naps” are the worst possible angles any opponent could choose.
I Hate Green Beans by Lincee Ray
Later that night, Rachel gives the cold air of Finland the bird by wearing a crop top to dinner. Or she forgot to update her weather app with her current location. Either way, it was a poor choice. No amount of butterbeer can keep her warm.
Possessionista by Dana Weiss
TV Lust by Abby Draper
Chris Harrison re-introduces this seasons rejects who have agreed to appear on national television for just five more minutes of “fame." Honestly, I recognized five of these women and I’ve written about every episode of this season.
There's Jaimi, who I don’t remember; Liz, who had sex with Nick at Jade and Tanner's wedding; Elizabeth, who I don’t remember; Josephine, who looks strangely like Vienna from Jake's season; Lacey, who I don’t remember; Christen, who I don’t remember; Alexis, who wore a dolphin suit out of the limo; Dominique, who I don’t remember; Astrid, who I don’t remember; Hailey, who I don’t remember; Taylor, who said “emotional intelligence” too much; Sarah, who I don’t remember; Jasmine G., who I don’t remember; Danielle L., who I don’t remember; Corinne, this season's villain; Whitney, who I don’t remember; Danielle M., who I don’t remember; and Kristina, who was dumped by Nick before hometowns.
Reality Steve (SPOILERS!)
Can we put an end to one thing that is driving me batty when we get to around this episode every season please? I don’t know how many seasons in a row we’ve heard or seen this, but it seems like every single one. Someone remaining when it gets to four or less, will almost inevitably say (and I’m paraphrasing here): “Marriage is very important to me. I only want to be married once.” Really? Stop. Just stop. It’s such an obvious statement, I don’t know why people feel the need to utter this to drive a point home. I highly doubt anyone in a serious relationship is actually thinking, “I’d like to be engaged to this person someday, get married, and get divorced. Ultimately, I’m looking for my marriage to fail.” You don’t need to tell us that you only want to be married once. Any rational human being understands that.
Then, of course, there’s Elizabeth, who says the phrase “I’m all for someone releasing their inner Khaleesi but you were a total slob kabob out there!” To which America replied, “literally what are you talking about and also who the fuck are you?”
Seriously, who. Is. Elizabeth? Was she just wearing so much makeup nobody recognized her? Did she really just quote Kourtney Kardashian and think we wouldn’t notice? Is she a Russian plant sent to keep an eye on Kristina? These are questions I have.
Do the contestants watch themselves on television and think, "hey, I know why I can't find love! I need to look more like a stripper!" Why do they always come back looking so damn trashy? Case in point: the women in the below photos are actually the same person.Kristina could live for a whole year eating this girl's lipstick.
Here to Make Friends with Emma and Claire and Sharleen Joynt (Huffington Post)
Reality Steve with Michelle Money again (SPOILERS!)
Bachelor Party with Juliet Litman and Ben Higgins (Channel 33)
Coming up Roses with Barstool Chief, Barstool Trent, and Kelly Keegs (Barstool Sports)
Rose Buddies with Griffin and Rachel McElroy
The Most Dramatic Bachelor Podcast Yet with Katie Aldrin and Sam Chalsen
Broses Before Roses with four dudes in a room. That's actually how they describe it.
Will You Accept this Podcast? (Bustle)
Will You Accept this Rose? (Nerdist)
Wells's Drunk Snapchat is amazing again!
Here's my #DrunkSnapchat for #TheBachelor #WomenTellAll in its entirety! All the things you probably said yourself, said by a guy who was on the show that one time...
Posted by Wells Adams on Tuesday, March 7, 2017
You've seen this, right? It's hilarious.
Finding the perfect babysitter can sometimes feel like the most dramatic dating show ever...
Posted by What's Up Moms? on Wednesday, March 1, 2017
Bachelor Nation News:
Ali is married (Us Weekly)
Tanner and Jade are having a baby! (InTouch)
Rachel gave Raven a note after her last rose ceremony (Bustle)
Well, look at that. Luke is seeing Danielle L. It's almost like she was cast for him. (Us Weekly)
More Luke: He says he's more comfortable with himself than Nick is (Us Weekly), and he reveals who would get his final rose (People)
Dad recaps The Bachelor, and it's actually really funny (Today)
26 Hilarious Tweets about Monday's episode (Buzzfeed, of course)
What you didn't see from the Women Tell All (E! Online)
This is what Taylor means when she says the show affected her professionally (Us Weekly)
Apparently Josh and Amanda are still working on things? I don't believe it. (Us Weekly)
Hmmm....Vanessa went to a bridal shop (Us Weekly)
Juan Pablo is "close to getting engaged," whatever that means. (Us Weekly)