Sure, give breathy, baby-voiced Krystal a rose. We don't care. Except we do. A LOT.
Bachelor League Episode 1 Commentary:
In which I tell you guys what I think about the ladies: the good, the bad, and the ugly pink dresses.
Arie's Bachelor Blog (People)
So many of the entrances stood out. Krystal’s presence was undeniable and her Ferrari red dress was burned into my memory forever. Her mediation and breathing exercise was totally needed and actually helped calm down my wild nerves. Speaking of nerves, I still can’t believe I was so nervous that Tia’s I hope you don’t already have a little weiner joke went right over my head. Becca K. reminded me why I was really there — to end up on one knee — and Seinne’s sincere, thoughtful gift of the elephant cuffs showed me that this night wasn’t all jokes.
Chris Harrison’s Blog (Yahoo! TV)
There are so many interesting women this year, and over the coming weeks you’re going to see new sides of them. Chelsea’s dry wit, Jenna’s incredible energy, Kendall’s quirks, and of course Tia’s charming accent.
Sharleen Joynt (FLARE Magazine)
For the first time ever, I’m not putting the First Impression Rose recipient in my Top 4. Chelsea certainly made the premiere cringeworthy (and thus entertaining) to watch with her taking Arie for 1-on-1 time twice (tsk tsk) and her increasingly bitchy comments. Who didn’t groan when Arie gave her the FIR? My issue here is that it’s WAY too early to be coming off as the controversial woman in the house. Every villain of seasons past at least kept that side of themselves under wraps until a few episodes in, and maybe saved their criticisms for ITMs only. Chelsea has already made herself Enemy Number One, with or without the FIR, and I don’t see her lasting super long because of it.
Don't miss Sharleen's full recap on her website too!
Arie finally enters the mansion to give his welcome speech, and note what happens. I think I've said before that producers give one woman a drink to hand to the Bachelor when he enters. In this case, it's Chelsea. I don't think this is was random choice.
Fun Fact: In the case of my season, I was assigned that obligatory drink duty (despite the fact that I wanted to be invisible and tried to get out of it)...
I have a personal suspicion that this move is designed to potentially paint a contestant as somewhat strategic or conspiring. For example, I have doubts that Elise's shocked reaction is at my handing over that drink. I am the first to admit I could be overthinking this thanks to the chip on my shoulder I acquired due to the internet seeing me that way based on this move.
Ali Fedotowsky (aliluvs.com)
Chelsea is obviously the villain of the season so far. It will be interesting to see how she gets along with the girls throughout the rest of the season. And I have to say is that I was pretty shocked at that passionate kiss between her and Arie right off the bat. I can’t even put my finger on why it was so shocking to me, I guess I just don’t see them together and that kiss seemed SO intimate.
Ashley I. (Cosmopolitan)
The premiere had me wishing Peter was the salt and pepper bro standing up on that wet driveway with his roses. Maybe Arie was just nervous? Maybe we'll move past the race car driver puns in a few weeks? And maybe hopefully he'll find someone, fall madly in love and marry them this year so poor Sean and Catherine (the only couple to ever wed from The Bachelor, unless you count Mesnick... and let's not?) don’t have to come back for the premiere episode pep talk for the 5th year in a row.
Yahoo! TV by Kristen Baldwin
Jenna, the social media manager, gives Arie a socks-off foot massage while blathering on about her “super-in-tune” senses and all the free food and “spa stuff” she gets on a regular basis. For some reason, Arie finds this whole flibbertigibbet act “intriguing” — it might have something to do with Jenna being a tall skinny blonde, but that’s just a guess.
Vulture by Ali Barthwell
Let’s meet a few of my personal favorites. There’s Tia, who is friends with Raven and her intro package includes shots of her hanging out at Raven’s store, Grey Suede. First, there must be some well in Arkansas where they keep finding these bitches. Second, I definitely thought Raven’s store was named “Greg Suede” because of the unfortunate Pinterest-inspired font choice. Then there’s Kendall, your absurdly attractive “weirdo.” She plays the ukulele and collects giant taxidermy animals. There’s Koach Krystal, who has an online fitness “empire” and a voice made for ASMR. She says she has a passion for nutrition, so obviously I despise her.
I Hate Green Beans by Lincee Ray
Sweet Caroline is really good at her job. Just ask her. She made five million in a year, and she’s looking forward to getting Arie off the market. Also, boobs.
Possessionista by Dana Weiss
And then Krystal happens. I am just going to put this out there right now. I don’t care how nice she is. I don’t care how kind and compassionate she is. I don’t care about any of it. Krystal is the kind of person whose email is written in Comic Sans. I am probably going to get blocked by Krystal on social media and it’s going to happen sooner rather than later. Because Krystal is what would happen if an inspirational instagram account took human form, and I am not about to give her a follow.
There’s a lot of bold strategies happening rn. Lauren G comes right out of the gate by shoving a pineapple down Arie’s throat and telling him her safe word. Another girl brings him pizza and holds him hostage until he’s done eating it. I guess nothing says true love like coercion.
Okay, Jenna def did all the coke she owned before getting on the plane to come here. Arie is just like, “I have no idea what she’s saying but I love her boobs it.” I can see you really understand what you want in a relationship, bro.
Krystal pulls Arie aside to tell him about her diet and workout plan deeply intimate parts of her life. I’ve decided she has the personality of a dumbbell.
Bachelor Nation Weekly (Afterbuzz)
Almost Famous with Ben Higgins and Ashley Iaconetti (iHeartRadio)
Bachelor Live with Julia Cunningham and Robert Mills (EW Radio)
Bachelorette Party with Juliet Litman and Ben Higgins (The Ringer)
Here to Make Friends with Claire and special co-host Brent Vergara (Huffington Post)
Reality Steve with Juliet Litman (SPOILERS!)
Will you Accept this Rose? with Arden Myrin, Erin Foley, and Rob Benedict (Nerdist)
Bachelor Nation News:
Jef Holm tweets:
— j e f h o l m (@jefholm) January 2, 2018
...and Arie responds (Us Weekly)
Rachel is covering the College Football National Championship for Extra Yard
Otherwise, Bachelor Nation is pretty quiet. Or I've been swamped with getting score posted and just missed it. Either way, I'll keep you updated as I hear new info!